OJ to her girlfriends (proudly): Ahem! Notice my new glasses?
Girlfriend 1 (blankly): New glasses? They look the same.
OJ (huffily): These are Tommy Hilfiger tortoiseshells. The old ones were black.
Girlfriend 2 (absently): I never noticed your old ones either.
OJ (glaringly): The problem with you guys is that you love me for the person I am!
Vox populi