Mere Paas Maa Hai (aur dimaag nahi)

12 May

Happy Hallmark-dictated-skyrocketing-sales-great-for-the-economy Day.

Because my Mother’s Day is October 27th, the day I celebrate the something elseness that is the lady who birthed me and taught me to be sensible, cautious, forward-thinking, hygienic, feminist, organized, articulate, logical, and unable to stand by and just watch life happen—in her own image.

If we want to celebrate a generic Mother’s Day, on the other hand, I would need to include a hell lot more people who nurtured and mothered me–an aunt with a soul connection, another who is my confession padre, my grandmothers, both biological and adopted, my best friend and rock, and an erstwhile boyfriend, who despite being a clueless 20-something himself, could teach every woman who’s ever pushed a human out of her a thing or two about unconditional love.


If our mothers are indeed so special, how come we bunch them up, assign them one universal day filled with hoopla, bells, and whistles, and move on before the overpriced flowers have wilted? Of course they’ll lap it up. Hell, after chronic sleep deprivation, poopy diapers that even they can’t claim smell like roses, and the sheer relentlessness of attending to needs for twenty plus years of the human life span, they’ll lap up far less pleasantness with a bring-it-on gratitude. But are we really being fair to them, with this tacky song and dance affair? Or is it easier to just swipe that credit card, fall in line, and wholeheartedly buy into a greeting card company’s idea of banging profits?


To the mother who taught me to think: I love you every day. But on October 27th, I will celebrate you. Because you’re MY mother, not just A mother. And because you’re smart enough to recognize the difference.


Edited to add: Here’s a mother of multiples, sharing her point of view:

9 Responses to “Mere Paas Maa Hai (aur dimaag nahi)”

  1. dipali55 May 12, 2013 at 3:15 am #


  2. Dancing Fingers Singing Keypad May 13, 2013 at 11:31 am #

    What you have written rings so true!

  3. Aunty G. May 13, 2013 at 12:42 pm #

    Willy-nilly you’ve paid tribute
    Despite your (r)anti attitude
    We respect your take
    The claim you stake
    27th October is your ma’s day, we’ll not refute!

  4. sukanyabora May 14, 2013 at 7:35 am #

    Agree wholeheartedly.
    But I am a mom and I love the over the top attention I get on this day from my kids. They love to pamper me, start planning for this weeks ahead. It is just another reason to celebrate and for us, the celebration junkies…we love it. We try not to get sucked into the commercialization of it all…everything I have gotten thus far has been created and made by the kids themselves. Who needs an over priced bouquet when you get a bunch of beautiful paper flowers made diligently with a whole lotta love or who needs a meal at a fancy restaurant when one can have fun with a special backyard BBQ and homemade brownies! Its just another occasion that nudges us count our blessings and good fortune.

  5. Orange Jammies May 20, 2013 at 11:38 pm #

    dipali55, DFSK, Aunty G: 🙂 Glad you understand.

    sukanya: Fair enough, if that works for you. 🙂 Do read the link I’ve added at the end of the post. It talks about running the risk of not taking mothers for granted for only that one day in the whole year.

  6. girlinjammies May 22, 2013 at 7:54 am #

    I agree. It is way too overrated and commercialized. I don’t believe we need a day to celebrate motherhood, love, etc.

  7. Orange Jammies June 3, 2013 at 7:33 pm #

    girlinjammies: Hello, nearly-namesake! 😀

  8. Reema June 4, 2013 at 10:05 pm #

    Each to his/her own!!!

  9. Orange Jammies June 8, 2013 at 12:51 am #

    Reema: Sigh. That’s such a safe answer.

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