A Scar In The Sty

5 Sep

Little Boy T was a teacher like no other. His first words to me, as I grasped his wrist, were “Fuck you!” Being two decades older than him was cancelled out by the fact that I was brought up in a home where ‘stupid’ is a cuss word. And from that moment on, I learned a few good things:

  • A 3-year-old needs exactly 2 ½ seconds to scoot.
  • If your mamma’s a junkie and she married daddy after he raped her at 14, you’re likely to be more than a little messed up.
  • Your stupid therapist who grew up under a rock will look blankly at you when she hears the word “reefer” (Okay, so in my defense, he pronounced it “weefer”.)
  • It takes time to get used to hugs if you haven’t been given any.
  • But sometimes we grow to love them pretty quickly.
  • We may all pretend to not give a tiny rat’s ass about approval, but we do, do, do.
  • Baby teeth can be deceptively vicious.
  • A mop of sandy hair bobbing at your knees each morning works better than caffeine.
  • One of the inherent qualities of the XY chromosome is the ability to aim.
  • You can tantrum with some people all of the time, with others some of the time, but you can’t be screeching “I hate you, bloody cow!” to your mamma, no sir.
  • When you hear “I’m stared by that noise in the sty” and “Oh, look at that pretty titty!”, it’s funny even the 100th time.
  • Stability is more than a house that won’t collapse in an earthquake.
  • When it comes to who’s helping whom, the lines are often blurred.

Happy Teacher’s Day, T.

Miss OJ can’t get your crinkled eyes out of her head.

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14 Responses to “A Scar In The Sty”

  1. Thinking Cramps September 5, 2008 at 11:37 am #

    Wow. Every one of those points hit home.

  2. D September 5, 2008 at 12:01 pm #

    Strange places and people who teach us the most valuable lessons of life!

  3. rajni September 5, 2008 at 12:48 pm #

    Happy Teacher’s Day OJ .
    The kids need more of them like you!:)

  4. Pallavi September 5, 2008 at 2:32 pm #

    Keep up the good work, OJ. A good teacher is inherently a good student 🙂

  5. gooddaysunshine September 5, 2008 at 5:51 pm #

    Love the header!

    Happy teacher’s day!

  6. sukanya September 5, 2008 at 7:58 pm #

    One of the inherent qualities of the XY chromosome is the ability to aim.

    When you hear “I’m stared by that noise in the sty” and “Oh, look at that pretty titty!”, it’s funny even the 100th time.

    Stability is more than a house that won’t collapse in an earthquake.

    I loved all of them but the above three were brilliant. I like the new look-your header. Is that you in the bg?

    I am finally de-lurking. I am in awe of your writing….am sure you make one heck of a teacher. And oh, happy teachers day. Your contributions often go unnoticed but you leave an indellible mark on your students!

    I look forward to reading OJ everyday now!

  7. Orange Jammies September 6, 2008 at 11:07 am #

    Thinking Cramps: 🙂 Not too hard, I hope.

    D: Hear, hear!

    Rajni: 😆 I’m not so sure about that! One cuckoo teacher is more than they can handle. 😉

    Pallavi: Very true. 😀 I missed mentioning yesterday– enjoy your trip!

    Gooddaysunshine: Thank you and thank you. 🙂

    Sukanya: Welcome. We love de-lurkers around here. 😀 Yes, that’s me in the background and no one’s ever been in awe of me, so I’m going to sit in a corner and see how that feels.

  8. Piper September 6, 2008 at 9:24 pm #

    you know, it does take time to get used to hugs. A serious amount of time. I remember standing stiffly,not knowing what to do with my arms, when The G`s mom hugged me for the first time. I never knew until then what a mommy hug felt like… 🙂

  9. Gulshan Aunty September 6, 2008 at 11:50 pm #

    Sigh OJ, you hit right home
    Inspite of the baby teeth — that lil’ gnome!
    Well, you live and learn
    Even as you eventually earn
    Those hugs from which you don’t ever want to squirm.

  10. Orange Jammies September 8, 2008 at 2:41 pm #

    Piper: Aww.. 😦

    Aunty G: That’s not a limerick! 😮

  11. dipali September 9, 2008 at 10:34 pm #

    Awwww, OJ. That was a great teacher you had. Wonder where he is and how he’s doing now.

  12. Orange Jammies September 9, 2008 at 11:18 pm #

    Dipali: I know where he is. I only shudder to think of what he’s doing.

  13. Aunty G September 10, 2008 at 5:49 pm #

    Oops, oh no, what was i thinking
    Yes, you’re right, that isn’t limericking
    Dunno what happened
    Alas! Am saddened
    Skulking off for wound a-licking.

  14. Orange Jammies September 11, 2008 at 3:15 pm #

    Aunty G: But you’re still the best,
    Way above the rest,
    Now if only I could
    Be even half as good,
    I’d be supremely blessed.

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